Hope in the Unconscious and Symbols of Truth: A Dialogue with Dr. Lauren Dolinsky

Transcript auto-generated from the episode audio; formatting has been cleaned up, but wording is verbatim.

I'm Cynthia Marks. I head up the Holistic Psychoanalysis Foundation, founded by my late husband, Doctor Bernard Bail.. Welcome to And Now Love. And today we welcome back Doctor Lauren Dolinsky. Doctor Lauren Dolinsky is a practicing psychotherapist here in Los Angeles. And really follows and believes in Doctor Bail's methodology and theory. And we're so happy to have Lauren practicing the way she does, and to be here with us to describe what she's so deeply believes in. And we want to support what you're doing however we can. And you're all about what we're talking about.

So this is an exciting and easy conversation. Well, thank you for having me back. Happy to be. Here. Good. Thank you. And we talked about what we were going to talk about. And we want to talk about hope. I think we want to talk about hope. I think the. Whole world. Could use some hope right now. So tell us what that means. Given the scope of what we deal with here. Well, I just thought. It would be a nice. Topic, because just the way the world is. Right now. The whole state of the world. And in every direction, I feel. We could all use. Some hope.

And, you know, it. Shows up for. Us in all kinds of ways. And doing this. Work, I believe. The unconscious. Likes to give. Us messages. Of hope all along the way. So I thought that that would be a. Really nice thing for us to focus on today. And the goal. Not give. Up. And yeah, help us not give up. Especially we. Talk so much on here. About trudging. Through. A lot of the harder material. And that's so much. The focus of the therapy. And moving through. A lot of. A painful. Stressful. Anxiety ridden, just. All the darker stuff. And that's so important.

And that's. Really how. We change is letting go of so much of that. But along the. Way, we often get these really beautiful. And lovely hopeful messages. They often tend to be spiritual. They go. Hand in hand. With the idea. Of change and transformation. So I thought. Maybe just shining a little. Spotlight on that piece could be really nice. Thank you very much. Yeah. So how do you want to go about that? Well, you were. Gracious enough to provide some dreams for. Us to look at. And we could. Just dive. Right into that and take a look and that will just open up more of a conversation about it.

I think so, yeah, we we did dive. In. That way. But one thing before we do that, one thing that I've become more comfortable with in talking with you and and being on this podcast, is the idea of the symbols in our dreams. And I kind of Pooh poohed that. There was sort of a commonality, but I can really see that that is the case because we all have certain things that we deal with in life. Typically, every day the sun comes up. Yes, we. Sleep. We have a soft pillow or we don't. Or you need so many things that we share in common that represent something.

The sun. Coming up. Symbolic, right? Sign up. Sundown. I mean, so many things in the human experience that become. Archetypal. Symbolic. That. Have, you know, kind of collective meaning and dreams. What do I do if I lose my phone? Right. Right. That kind of thing. I'm going to have so much more energy after I have my three cups of coffee. Right. Or. Yeah, right. The idea of. Waking up, sobering up, not being drunk to what's going on, you. Know, all. All kinds of things, not to mention all the bathroom stuff. Cleaning up, letting go. You know, there's.

There's. So many things and so many. Ways. That the mind likes to think about certain ideas that are important to. Each of us. And that reflect an internal. Process. That's happening. So what we're. Always looking for in the dreams is that. What's. Happening in the person's internal world, and what's. The process. That's going on? And the dream will use symbolic language to. Talk about that. And you know, where it gets interesting is that. Typically every. Dream. Is very. Personal to the unique dreamer. So we're. Talking about. All these like collective.

Symbols. And that's important to know. And we can apply that. But we always want to be very. Very. Careful when we're working. Therapeutically. That we make. Sure to talk about. You know, the unique meaning to the person and not just jump. To a collective. Symbol because we might miss something. Very. Unique and important to that individual's. Story that. Their mind really wants to work on, and that they need for their own growth and transformation in that moment. So it's always. An interesting balancing. Yeah. The fascinating for you, I'm sure.

But the reason that I, I'd say 69 might have to go back to school and learn math, while there could be a commonality to that. What brings me to needing that experience is different than what it might be for somebody else? Absolutely. Yeah. In almost every dream, you know, and and at the same time, sometimes we have dreams that. Really speak to. Something in the collective. Or were. Dreaming. For the collective. And, you know, it can be interesting to see that. So I think some of the dreams that we're going to talk about. Today kind of they strike.

A nice balance. You know. They're your. Dreams again. Is very gracious of you. To open that up and bring them in and. Share with the. Audience so we can all learn from you. Thank you. Yeah. No thank you. And you know, so. They they will each have such. Specific meaning to you. And since this is in a. Therapeutic. Setting we're not going to work with them that way. And, and talk too much. About your personal history. And do what we might do in a session. But instead we're going to look at some of the messages that I think. Could be helpful for everybody.

Okay. So we'll start with one. Okay. I see a woman before me. She stands about 12in away. She is about four foot six inches tall about four foot six. That's pretty specific. And 12in. Away. She has walked and stopped here right in front of me. She has on a beautiful, soft white gown. Looks Victorian, but a little simpler. It almost looks like a wedding dress, but it isn't a wedding dress. It's silk, has a tight bodice and a slightly full skirt. Her head and neck are covered by a tight gold threaded cap of sorts. Her face is simple. No makeup, maybe freckled straw colored hair.

She looks in my eyes and says, either I do or I will do it. I can't remember either way, though. I am to understand that she is confident and will make what needs to happen happen. In the dream, I wonder if she is my angel. Yeah. What a beautiful dream, right? I mean, that's one of those dreams that hardly needs any interpreting. Right. It's. It's not convoluted and riddled. With all. Kinds of. Layers. And it's. So. Simple and. Beautiful. And I imagine, and maybe you can tell. Us what the. Feeling was. That you felt. Having that dream or even waking up to it, and just.

What your. Experience. Was. So I remember thinking that that last sentence that, you know, maybe this was my angel that when I woke up that really stuck with me. Like could that be possible. Is that, could there be such a thing. And I'm dreaming, dreaming this I'm dreaming this. And in my waking life, I probably couldn't easily admit to such a thing. Okay, but here. It is, being presented to me in my unconscious. If my intellect doesn't want to buy it, it doesn't seem to matter. We bypass the intellect. Yeah. By giving you an experience of it.

I mean, this is one of the reasons we love working with dreams. Is we. There's so much feeling in there that we want the dreamer to connect to. Because there's there's truly a reality. In it. And I think so many people, when it comes to the more spiritual. Side of life for the people. Who are open to it. And what's interesting is dreams like this will come. Whether. A person has conscious. Spiritual. Inclinations or not. You know? And that's always. A fun thing to talk. About, especially. If someone's not. Necessarily. Super open to that idea.

And look, we don't impose that on anybody. I am never. Here to. Impose any. Spiritual ideas. On anyone that doesn't want them. But the unconscious tends to come with certain. Messages of help. And hope from that. Side anyways, so. People can take. It however. They want and and whether. They think it's literally. An angel. Or literally. Something from God or from the spiritual. World, that's completely up to every. Person to decide. And we're not talking about religion or any kind of organized religion at all. You know, this. Is just the spiritual.

World and the idea. That possibly there's help there. And having it in a dream. You get the experience of it. And I think. That's what people are so hungry for, because we can talk about ideas all day. Long and go. Well, I think that would. Be so neat if there. Was a God. And there was a loving God, and there was. All this. Help and there were angels. That sounds so nice. But when we get something like this. That we feel and we get a. Personal dream, and you. Get this. Woman who's going to show up. And not only that, I mean, we can talk. About all these little details.

In the dream because they're interesting. You know, it just jumped out to me listening to it this time that she was going to say. I do to you. It did too to me when I said that. Yeah. Like wow that's a big, big statement right. There in the. Statement. You know when we hear that statement. Yeah. Yeah. So there's something about that in that when I said at this time I do, the thing that came to my mind was am I married to spirit. Exactly. Exactly. And that you, you. Know, this is, a. Woman of being an entity. Who, as you say. Can get things done.

She can get things done. So if you're. Married to her. And what she. Represents. What a nice message for you. If you're going through any kind of hard time in your life. To be able to. Hang on to that and use. This as a touchstone. In your. Life through everything. This isn't just a dream where it's like. Well, you just. Had it the one time and it's a one day only. You're right. You know. There's an intention right now. Yeah. There's no expiration date on that. You you can tune into that any time because it's a marriage. Yeah. So how does one make that stick?

You know, I had this dream. Yeah. This was several years ago. Yeah. And at that point, I would probably be I was in the business of sort of not allowing this kind of information to be real for me. And, and in a way, in this dream when I said to myself maybe she's maybe it was like a secret was in my dream. So I don't really have to admit to it. Well like that's the beauty of you. Just kind of get to. Wrestle with that. I mean, if we were working clinically with it, you know, we could have conversations about that and just see. Where it goes. But I.

Would just encourage. People to to take the message. You get a message like that. You know. Receive it. See if you can open your mind and your. Heart to that sort of thing. And. How you'd like to apply that to your life. That's the beautiful. Thing too. Is where where could you. Use some extra help? Where do things feel. Really, really hard. That maybe you could use some divine intervention. You could use some divine guidance to get through something. Sticky or, or difficult. Challenging that. That just feels so hard to deal with. It's a beautiful.

Thing. And here's the thing. Sometimes I don't know what was happening in your life. I don't know if you remember what was going on. I do. Okay. And it was my dreams were many of them extremely intense? Yes. And frightening. Yeah. And I was getting to the bottom of something in my life that I held as a truth. For decades held as a truth. And let that false thing kind of be my North star. And it led me astray over and over again. But I no matter how much it led me astray, I was going to keep buying into it. And my dreams were giving me the opportunity to really investigate that.

And so the dreams became sort of scarier. And then this dream kind of popped in to all of that. Yeah. Like wow. What is this little breath of fresh air. Right. And that's a good way to put it. And I think sometimes that's. How it. Happens. And that's why I. Love this. As an example, because we don't want people to think. That as. You're dealing with that. Darker, scarier stuff, which we all if we choose. To go down the path of digging into our unconscious, inevitably. That's where. We end up going, because there's so much of. That for each of us to.

Attend to. But it's not. Like we have to get to a reward at. The end of the road. You don't have to get, you know, a certain amount of healing done. You don't have to. Have all these. Transformations and changes. You can get a dream like this at any point and you can get help along the way. So again, today. I really. Just wanted to emphasize this point to maybe. We all get to. Keep an eye. Out for that. For ourselves. This is just a beautifully clear dream. Again, it's not sandwiched in with a bunch. Of crazy, scary stuff. Like it's just a very.

Simple. Beautiful. Dream. But you know, sometimes a dream like that will come sandwiched in a lot of other material. And, you know, I would encourage. People to look for the gold in those. If there's. Little glimmers of. That, maybe there. Is some help. There buried. In the scary. Stuff too. So let's not lose sight of that. I love the idea that this. Came to you when you really did need some encouragement to reexamine a lot. Of these. Things, to go into the scary material. To to question. Whether the North. Star should really. Be a North. Star.

And if it's not, you know, that's very un morning, very. If I abandoned that, what do I have? Yeah. You have no solid ground beneath you. And look, it's a good thing. We know, you know, talking about it now, you can see on the other. Side of it that that's. Amazing. You know, probably the best thing that could happen. The very best thing that could happen to me in my life as an individual. Yes. To discover that my North Star, supposed North Star was, you know, none of that. Well, that that's a very. Brave thing to do. You know, not all of. Us get the.

Opportunity to. To look. At that and go down that. Path. But that's that's incredible. Like, what a gift. Yes. I feel so, so fortunate. Yeah. So fortunate. So about the scary dreams, though, and finding these moments of hope when you I think when you're starting to uncover something like what I've suggested, I held this truth and you start to think about dismantling it. You know, I think then I think that the scary dreams kind of bring you to the point, perhaps, at least for me, of recognizing what was false about that North Star and then having to kind of face it and say, do I want to hold on to it?

It's my choice, right? Or am I going to be better off letting go of that and again, what happens when I let go of that? So then the dreams become scarier. Like you're thinking about letting go of this, right? Yeah. You're you're you're. Messing with the system. You're rattling up the system. And that's when the person's internal. Saboteur. Comes in and goes. Not so. Fast. Are you sure? It's this very outdated. Primitive. Way to protect you. From from changing this? Because we have to imagine for. Everybody if there's a false. False North. Star, it was put there to.

In an effort to. Protect the. Person from a great deal of pain. That's usually the setup. And so. Things will get very. Scary in an effort to try and protect you from having to feel this ancient pain, which is more connected to. Probably, Something more. Real, a reality that's hard to face. That maybe there wasn't. Love at. The foundation of something when we needed there. To be. Yes. You know, it's. Usually. Some version of that. Yes. Which is exactly what this was. Right. So something that I thought was absolute love and I allowed to dictate the course of my loving relationships.

I found myself in situations that weren't right really love. They were more like that falsehood in that North Star. Yes. Yes, exactly. And not satisfying. Right. Exactly. Exactly. So yeah. So they. Will things will. Get scarier as you. Face that and actually confront it. And don't just go along with the. Status quo, which is all these false beliefs of, oh, this is just what love is and this is the way. You know, you go down that path, your things won't. Be as scary. They won't feel good. It'll be deeply. Unsatisfying. Right. But if. You're not messing with that, it may not get as.

Scary. That's why. You know, the more we can lean in when the. Scarier stuff. Happens, we're. Usually. On the. Right path. And again, that's why I'm highlighting. It's not. Just all. Fire and brimstone doing that. There's also help. Yes, there's also help. And so there's you know, it doesn't have to you don't have to do it alone. And even if you're not in a. Therapy where you're doing this. With somebody. Which would be ideal because. Then you really know. What you're dealing with, right? But let's just say that you're. Listening and you want to examine some of this stuff in your, your own dream.

Life that you can take a look and just know that. Even. As you're. Doing it on your own, you can still. Have help. Come in from, you know, a spiritual realm or. Whatever it is you believe. In. We're not really. Alone. So to stop and think about that, when you're having this group of, let's say, scary dreams and you think, I don't want to dream anymore. I mean, this is awful. Every night I go to bed and yeah, I have to wake myself up. And then you have a dream like this. And you've given all of this, all of these emotions to those scary dreams you bought into this.

The fearfulness or the upset or the confusion. But to maybe give this a dream like this kind of equal attention. Wow. What about even. More, right? Like that? Maybe that's more of the reality. Than all. Of the really scary stuff that's really just. Designed to scare. You? Well, first. I mean, it's scary stuff that's inherited for generations that we all. Have to deal. With. And there's so much. Trash. In all of our minds. So that stuff is very scary. And then there's the extra. Layer of scary. Of when you're going to try and face it and. You know, the.

Part of your mind is trying to protect you against it. So that's a lot. All of that is based on lies. You know, there's a lot of very real pain. But what. The outcome is that we then believe. A lot of lies about ourselves, about whether we're lovable. You know, just what. What what's available to. Us in this. World, what these. Limits are. And, you know. It's just all lies. We get a dream like this, and. We get a little closer to the truth, right? So I always say, give it more weight. I think I think so, and it's almost like in this dream it was so devoid of all the other.

Yeah, you crash break. You got a really nice break in this dream, but it's. Almost saying to me, here's what you really are. Plain and simple. You are not all that stuff. That's right. You're not all that trauma, all that trash. Look, that's what we. Come here. To deal with as a human. And we each have our path of what? What we're supposed to. Contend with in our life as a. Human. Yes. Which is ongoing. Which is. Ongoing. And like you say, at any age, we're still in school. Yeah. You know, so but. Here's a little snippet of what a cleaned up simple.

Yeah. Whole healthy. Yeah. And as things get cleaner and cleaner in the mind, a lot of times we see the messages come in a little more simply, you know, because. The truth is usually. Pretty simple. We love to see a. Very simple dream like this. Where. We just know, okay, there's divine help. And again, we can talk about that. You give. Yourself some fun numbers in there in case you needed extra encouragement and all all. These little. Symbols. That. I think bring the message home. But we don't even really need them. The message. Is there. She can get it done.

She can make things happen. You're married to her. She wants to marry you. Yes. So there's that safety net. I always have this as. Like, if back on it, she's ready to say I do. Yeah, yeah. And I will. I will make it happen. So then to that would it be a message of here's some hope and help for you. You haven't agreed to it yet but I'm here, I'm here. Yeah. She's available. So like you said. You can resist it and go, angels. That's crazy. Like I don't. Really buy into it. And I think she's just letting you know. No price still standing by. I'm here.

Yeah, take it or leave it. But the help's available. And I think that's true for everybody. So it's sort of like a take it or leave it this side of life is available to everybody. It's available to. Everybody. And you can think about it. You can use whatever construct. Feels right to you. And if it's not the divine, you know, maybe it's the universe or energy. Or or just. Something that. Just feels helpful. And maybe. Just bigger. Than. Ourselves. Bigger than. Our human. Yeah. Than our conquer. Waking experience that maybe. There's something a little more.

Everybody gets to. Define that for. Themselves. Yeah. Dream like that. She's she's there, you know, she's ready to help. So you get to decide what you. Want to do with. That. It's hard for me the numbers part okay. So I mean the, the we spoke about maybe a cup of coffee means a similar thing to everyone, but everyone has a different experience using that symbol. But the number four. Yeah. Does it have the same number four seems to me like it could mean something different to every individual. How how did numbers come to be? It's a good. Question, and it is one of those things where we want to be careful in a dream not to just jump to.

Oh well. Four always means. This because I always first. Want to hear from the dreamer and I want to hear. Do that. Does that number mean anything to them personally? Are we. Talking about and you know. What. Let's let's go. Down the personal. Route first. And then numbers. Do carry a certain collective. Symbolic. Vibration. Each of them a little different. And they they. All have. Their own unique meaning. And there's so many systems. That talk about this like the tarot. Numerology, and, you know, these. More esoteric. Systems designed to connect to the unconscious and that there.

Is a sort of collective. Meaning with numbers, and they. All just have so. Much. Overlap. That we can't ignore that. Oh, maybe when we talk. About a. Four and a six and a 12. That you're. You're trying to give yourself a message. And it's interesting. Because you could have picked any height. Right. And you could have. Said she's. One foot. Away. But you said she was 12in away. You know, and you picked certain numbers, I think intentionally, you know, that your unconscious did that intentionally. Just to try. And drive a message home. So what is the message.

What is the message of what is my 12 mean. Yeah. Well again if we were working with this clinically we'd maybe go down a different path. And I'd ask. You a lot of questions about that. But just for the sake of what. We're talking about here, when I hear. This, what a 12. Can mean. Is. A new perspective. So a 12. In the tarot, that's the Hanged Man. And it's like basically turning everything upside down, I see, and getting an entirely new perspective. So I like that in light of what you're talking. About here, because you're saying everything's been so dark and scary.

I'm in this really. Scary place. In my. Process. Of uncovering these. Truths that are so hard to face. Well, as you're. Doing that, you're gaining a whole new. Perspective. And maybe. Part of that is. Letting in a lot more light and a lot more help and maybe angelic help and something from that realm. So that would be. I think, a radical new perspective. For you. And that could. Be the 12. We also like to add. Up numbers too, so we can do like a one plus two and see. Three, which is. The abundance, the feminine Venus, you know, that's. A very.

Lovely number two. Just like we. Can add the four and the six and. You get a. Ten, which. We reduced. To a one. And that's like an as above. So. Below connection to. Spirit which is very appropriate. Right. And the use of these numbers and the combinations of the numbers are, there's a kind of a common thread through tarot etc., etc., etc.. Yeah. Which when you think about that, because they came from different parts of the world, different groups of people, interesting, fascinating. Yeah. I mean, this is. Why our collective. Unconscious is so interesting because something Jung would.

Talk about is all these. Symbols. That we have. In common. Cross-Culturally. And that's one of them, you know, numbers and the meaning of numbers, whether you're looking at tarot or numerology. Or whatever it is, there's so. Much. Overlap. And there's such. A. Universal nature. To it. So, you know, we want to listen. If the mind is trying to give us a message, the unconscious is trying to give us a message. Why not. Use. Everything we can to try and decipher? So if you put numbers in your dream, it's not just some random, it's not random. And again, it may not.

Directly be related to the way the tarot talks about. That number. You may be talking about an. Age you know, it. Could may be a number has. Like a real. Significance to. You. That it means something when it shows. Up. Maybe a 12 means whatever happens in a dozen, you know, who knows? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, there's all you know, and that's. Why I want to hear a person's associations, because maybe their mind already has some associations that could be important. And it could be that if we were doing this in a therapeutic sort of way, that you might say to me, well, you know, 12 means you're sort of turning the system upside down.

But if that didn't resonate with me, I could say, you know, I, I'm not feeling that one. And we would just investigate. Quietly. If something doesn't sound right to a person. Okay. No problem. You're going to keep dreaming. That's the beautiful. Thing about dreams. If there's a message that wants to come through and it hasn't come through, it's going to come back. So it's a wonderful system in that. Way, where. The messages will come in all different forms until the message. Is received. So it could be that I might say, well, that really doesn't sit right and maybe it doesn't, but maybe there's some amount of resistance that's creating that.

And if that's the case, it's going to keep coming back. It'll come back. Yeah, it might take. A whole. Nother form and a whole different dream, but it might carry a similar message. And we go. Oh, well. You know, maybe. It was. Pointing to something like that. Yeah. The four in the six. Before also is a, you know, like a solid foundation. It's it can be a very masculine number, the emperor, but. It's. Stability foundation and paired. With a six of love is again. You know, it's. You just filled this. Dream with really wonderful numbers. That carry a.

Certain. Message. Are there numbers that have a negative message? It's a good question. You know, a lot. We'd we'd have. To consider the context of a lot of things, like there's ones that might. Appear scary to people like. 13, which is so interesting collectively, that number has been so demonized. That people pull it out of elevators. And pretend it doesn't exist. Because. 13 oh my. God, like for the scary Friday the. 13th. And and it does often symbolize death. But in a really important way kind of what you're talking about a transformation letting.

Go so. Bad. No, I don't think that's a bad number. Same with something like The. Tower, which is. 16, which can be. Like. Systems collapsing, something internal. That was structural. Foundational, that was maybe built on a lie collapsing. That's terrifying. That's a scary, you know, if someone pulls. The tower. Card and. Tarot, they get a little scared. But it's ultimately a really good thing. It's it's. Liberating. It's designed to. Liberate you. And and to be more connected. To the truth. So both of those so are they're bad numbers? I don't think so.

We just want to look at them in their context. I actually was somewhere where I saw a street that was 13th Street and I thought, wow, I wonder if the property values are less. There. They should be more. You know, what's interesting too, is. That the. 13 is so connected to the divine feminine, which, you know. Collectively has been so suppressed. And repressed. And so. It's it's. No wonder that we've gone to great lengths to try and make the 13. Disappear. When it. Has such. A connection to the divine feminine. And so that's. Fascinating. Interesting.

Yeah. And then are things like freckles important? Maybe. I mean, I think anything in a dream is. Is put there for. A reason. So I'm prone to not saying. Oh, that's. Just meaningless. I'd want to hear more. I'd want to hear what that meant to you. Certainly could point to a certain innocence, a youthfulness. You know, you usually. Hear that. And. A youthful. Description. But, you know, we I'd want to hear your. Thoughts about it. Well, I think just talking about this one dream and then thinking about what so many of us think about our dreams, which is very little.

If you can just convince yourself that you're dreaming for a reason, and all the parts and pieces in your dream are in your dream for a reason. And you can. You put them, you put them. There, you put. Them there. So don't dismiss. Think about it. Yeah. Let's think about. Why. I mean, how fascinating. First of all, if a person is, say, having a dream like this and they're not in a therapeutic setting, can they sort of go through the process of what we just did a little bit, which was where we talked about the possibility of doing it? Well, what did you feel about, you know, when when we talked about the number 12, a person without someone like you might say, well, what does a 12 mean to me?

And you could go through some different scenarios and say, is it that it's a dozen? Is it what do you think of if you come up with three instead of 12, one plus two and start to think about what resonates, and then pay attention to future dreams that maybe or follow up to that number 12. Absolutely. I think that's. A fun exercise. No matter. What. You just get to kind of play with that part. Of your mind a little bit and build that relationship. You know, again, a dream like. This, it's like. We don't even need the the numbers. Are great. They help.

They kind of they drive. The point home. With. The. Message is so clear, this. Isn't even a dream that. We have to. Get in and. Wrestle with. So many dreams. Are so. Laden with toxic. Material that's designed. Almost not to be understood and not to be penetrated. And so in listening to them, you can often feel it. And it's hard, hard to get through. You feel. Like you're working through the mud a little. Bit, trudging. Trudging, trudging. That's none of that is in this dream. I would just just receive it. Should we do another one? Yeah. Okay. This one's not as long I live in a simple wood sided house that is painted white.

It's right on the water. I live with my teenage daughter and our dog. Other people are visiting. I seem to need to reiterate to myself in the dream that the simple house is right on the water. It's as if I couldn't quite believe that that were true, and I had to say it twice in order to hear myself. I see that was the that. Was the point that needed an emphasis on the dream. Yeah. Sort of like the last one in that I had to say to myself, I wonder if she is my. Angel. Having these internal thoughts. About. The dream in the. Dream. Well what. Did you think about that one when you had.

It. Well I think I like the idea of this simple house. Yeah. Seemingly without issues to contend with and that I'm there with this person, my daughter whom I love to pieces and that it's even a place where I get to keep her safe. And our dog is sort of a conduit between the two of us because we both love this dog. And, you know, he sort of goes between us. And it was as if all the parts and pieces could be kept safe by the water. So it's similar to what we were just talking about. In terms of things becoming more simple as they're cleaned up, you know, they don't have.

To be. So confusing and messy. And as we clear out a lot of this garbage, it's. It's nice to be in a simpler. Place because what you're describing. Is an internal place. To dwell. And I think. What you. Did in emphasizing it. Was by the water is you. Wanted to make a big point that you were going to live near the unconscious. Right, that you. Were going to start to make your home there, which means really being in relationship. All the. Time with the unconscious. And what a nice, simple. Life that could give you. And then not only that, you've painted.

The place white, which. You know, this is one of those things where. Colors. Like numbers. Yeah, can have meat. Now, it might have personal meaning to you. You know, we'd have. To talk about, well, how come that. But a lot of. Times. With white, it's that purity of. The divine again and being close. So you're close to spirit. You're close to the unconscious. You're close to the water. That's a lovely place. To make a home. So I think, again, this is one of those. Really hopeful dreams that also shows a real. Transformation. This isn't some scary haunted house.

With. God knows. What. Happening in every room this way. And, you know, all kinds of. Problems which all of us have those sorts. Of dreams. We all have. Them. And if. We're. Lucky enough to. To. Do enough renovating of our internal world, we might be able to simplify things. And again, talking about. The possibility that. Living near the unconscious. That building. A home, there. Could be a really. Hopeful and helpful thing. Even as you go through the scarier stuff, that that's still a better place to live. Because this dream was, again, in the midst of some very uncomfortable dreams.

Okay. Yeah. And that's how it will go. So again, like, I like. Talking about these things because these are the messages. We get. Along the way in. Process. In process. Not like. This is the pot of gold at the. End of the rainbow. And you. Have to be so. Advanced to. Get there. We all can have this. And it's not suffering the entire way along the way. We don't have to. Suffer the entire time. No, there are. Hard things to face. And and I think if we're doing it right. We we brush. Up against some painful stuff, you know, that's necessary. And that's part.

Of. Evolving and growing and releasing certain things and. Really. Developing and maturing as a person. Right. And we can have. Lots of help along the way. And it's not all miserable. And look at. What's available to all of us. So when you were talking about the color white before you said what you said, I was thinking, well, for me, white means fresh, clean, new. Yes. Yeah. Exactly. Right. And we don't even. Have to go the spiritual route with it. You could just say I needed a fresh start, a fresh place to. Live and to be by the water rather than in the water is am I supposed to be in the water?

I don't know that we need. To go to. Concrete with it, I think. I think. Living near the water, having access to the water. Being in relationship. With the water is great. We're going to give. Ourselves. Dreams. That. Also in some way. Feel realistic. Enough. I mean, you could. I you put the house on the water, you. Could. You know, and we could look. At it that way. Too. And I think, you know, that would be interesting as well. I don't know that we. Have to. Even think about it like, oh, well, the next step. Is you should live in the water. We just.

We want you in. Relationship with that. And aware of it. And aware of it in conversation with it, you know, at all times. I think if. If the. House and you're emphasizing it is right on the water. You're. You're interfacing and interacting with that. Water all the. Time, all the time. So to me that sounds pretty good. Again, if you wanted to build an underwater palace. Okay, I know. But I like that we have the ability in our dreams to point things out to ourselves. Like, I'm going to make sure that I am aware of what I'm trying to tell myself by telling it to myself twice.

Yeah, you wanted that part knowing you. Said, here's the important piece by the. Water. Simple and by the water. You know that that was the main point. Okay, so I have one one more, I think. Okay. I seem to always keep Larry, my dog in an old brown leather suitcase. Whenever I put him in it, I have to smash the top down in order for it to truly latch. One day I think to myself that this is really an odd thing to do, and I decide to never do it again. I feel better. I bet you would. Yeah. So in the dream, it's not just the dream of one day. It's somehow a dream where I know I'm doing this over and over again, right?

And then I recognize one day, gosh, I worked so hard at this. I don't have to do this. Why am I doing this? Yeah. I mean. What a huge. Realization, right? I mean, do you want to share your perspective on what you think you're dreaming about and in any way that you're comfortable sharing? Yeah. Well, I mean, there's two different things that come to mind in in what I was protecting and trying so hard to protect at the expense of what? You know, I was working so hard to make sure something stayed encased to my own detriment and not not being able to let go and know what happens if I don't work so hard to keep this thing under wraps.

Yeah, well, that sounds good. It was good. Yeah. And it was on the path to me becoming comfortable to actually be aware of what was my reality. Instead of smashing it down and managing. And we don't want the dog you know again speaking more. Just symbolically about it. Right. The dog is all. Instinct and feeling a little innocent animal. You must be pointing to something I would imagine that was maybe done to. You, that you. Then had to reenact so many times in your own intuition and feeling. Part of you smashed down and smashed down and put in this again and again, and to decide not to do that anymore is huge.

So the. Reason I thought. This. Stream fits in with. The others. Is an angel coming in to. Help, but it shows the process of change. It's a very hopeful dream which shows us all what's possible. That something you've done. Potentially your whole life you could. Decide not to do anymore. And what a. Relief that would be. You know, and what an even like a. True. Change. That would be as far as what that really. Means for you and your. Life. I think this was on the way to giving myself permission to be me. Yeah, absolutely. I would imagine at the core.

Of it, that dog is is probably you, your real. Feeling self. And if you don't have to be smashed down all the time and put in this. Suitcase. And, and. Hurt. All the time, and. You could just be free, that's revolutionary. It is. But it's also interesting in my telling you about the dream that I talked more about the smashing in the case than the dog. Well, they're both important. I mean. You were you your. Mind was focused on what had been done to you when that. What you. Then had to unknowingly reenact in your own life to your own self and go.

This is. How I'm supposed to be treated in this life. You know, this is what I got. So I'm going to keep doing this. Because this is how it's supposed to go for. Me, right? And and to come to. A. Realization that I don't have to do that anymore. Is a really big deal. We we want to highlight that. I don't want to throw away a dream like this and not think about it and not know that it carries something really important. It's so unbelievably refreshing to be given the gift of letting go of the stuff that you carry, that you pretend is you, so that you can really be you.

Oh, what a relief. I mean, we. All deserve that. Oh, each and every one of us. Yeah, we all deserve to be our realist, truest selves. You know, unencumbered or at. Least. Less encumbered. By. All the junk that we didn't even know. We were. Given to carry around, and all. The lies we've had to believe about ourselves. And, you know, the. The way. That impacts. Every aspect of our lives. I know, and, yeah, you know, it's certainly does more than dribble out into our communities. It builds our community. And that's right. That's right. And then everything has to be built on a false foundation.

If a if a. Human. Life is. Built on a false foundation, everything's built on a false foundation. We come together and we build false foundations. So the more each. Individual gets to be. A little more real and true to their own. Hearts, and get gets to live as their true selves, that has the opposite effect. Then we get to have. A more. Real. More loving foundation to. Start to build our lives on. It's interesting how you can always look out at the world and see what's going on, and then think about what's going on inside of you. Yeah, absolutely.

Absolutely. We have to. Do it from the inside out if we want anything to change. For sure. I mean, that is ever so important. It sounds sort of airy fairy, but it really isn't. It's it's the reality. Yeah, it's the reality. So you had some little snippets that you thought you could share with us that would be sure. So wonderful. We have we have time for a couple of those. So I brought in some recent patient dreams. That I thought were just so sad, like just little. Snippets. That drove. Home some of these points and would be nice. To hear because they're they're.

Just nice for everyone to hear. That this is a possibility. And when we talk about changing a foundation, I mean, one of them was that. The the. Flooring, the really the foundation of the room was all being painted. Over. Pink or. Shades of. Pink. And again, very simple. There was a bigger. Dream. To it, but just that piece. And again, we can look. For these. Really nice. Hopeful. Pieces in a dream, because that's a really nice idea. When we. Talk about. Changing the foundation. Of the way a. Person lives. So let's look at the floor right? And let's look at what it means to now have.

It pink, that I. Think in this context for what the person was dealing with, with meaning. Now we can have a foundation that's more love. That's a softer. Feminine, that's a. Softer love. You know, and also the. Idea of. You know, in the pink. We use that. Phrase when. Healthy. Healthy and in good spirits. So I'm certain that resonated with your client. Yes. Yeah. And it was and it. Was appropriate to what was. Going on in that person's life. It all made sense. But it's. Also it's it's such. A nice. Dream to have. So we want to hold on to these.

And there was another one. Where. That person was eating a. Bowl of, of puffy heart cereal. In milk. And yeah, so. It was these puffy red hearts. And again, you know, very simple. This isn't. Very convoluted. This is just a little snapshot. But to be able to. Eat from that and, and what that means to take. That. In and for that person to know. They are lovable. And they can. Receive love. And that that's for a lot of us, a really big idea. Yeah. Big idea. You know, sounds simple. And we. Talk about. These things all the time. And I think everybody intellectually knows that.

That's the way we should all. Live and what we should. All have. But it's what a. Lot of times our dreams don't. Reflect that, because. That's not. Actually the reality. That many of us live in emotionally. So what we. Want to. Do is get to a place where. Those things. Actually. Line up a little more, and the emotional reality in the unconscious enough has been cleared out. You know, enough of the garbage has been taken out and appropriately. Flushed. Or thrown away that now. We get to have this new experience. Now we get a new foundation, we get this new loving food to eat.

And you know, the person dreaming that. Gets that feeling. We're always focused on that. Like in your dreams. There's a there's a. Big feeling, I think in each of them. That's such a big relief. Yes, definitely. So this dream where the woman is eating this fabulous cereal, she's taking it in and she's looking at it and it's floating in milk, which is white. Yes. And yeah. And milk to you know, we know symbolically. Milk is is our first food. You know, and for so many of us. The milk we got. Our moms didn't mean to, but it wasn't. Necessarily the ideal.

Breast milk that we. All should. Have gotten emotionally. Whether literally that was provided. Or not. We want to look at what. That actually came with. You know what? The mom was actually feeding the baby emotionally. And a lot of times, again, not not blaming the mom at all because the mom was given so much in her own life to contend with. That. She didn't know that. She was passing. On. And we see it. Via the milk. And so sometimes we might have rotten milk. Sour. Cream, you know, dreams where. It's. Not. A. Really nice situation. So and then in this case, too, it would be up to your patient to know what that milk meant.

Yeah. And I think here. We have. It, you know, in, in a. Nice way. We, we have the. This is the milk everyone should. Have. This is the nourishment all of. Us should have. We should have the. Really nice milk. That's filled with the puffy red heart. Yeah. And that goes both ways. I'm able to love and receive. That's right. And when you can eat from that and really take that in and and receive. It, guess what? You're now. Available to give. You know, so. What a lovely. System. You know. That's so it's. A really nice dream. And I think let's see, one of the other ones from this.

Set was the idea of. Telling the backseat. Driver they weren't allowed to drive. Anymore. So I think that. Is such a. Similar one to. The suitcase. Dream. Right? Because it's like, no, we're going to stop doing this in a way. We could almost say, you, you almost had. A backseat driver. Doing that action. I don't think it was conscious. Right. And so we all, all of us have backseat drivers. We talk about them as an imprint. And oftentimes it's a parent or both parents, you know, parts. Parts of the. Parent. And they're unconscious driving, driving our lives and we don't know it entirely unconscious.

So we're going through this life thinking we're driving, and our dreams often show us otherwise. So for a. Patient to have a dream where they're telling the. Backseat driver. Enough, knock it off. I'm going to drive now. That's great. That is. That's huge. It's so fascinating that truly, through understanding our dreams, we can find out what stuff we've been carrying that doesn't belong to us. Right. And how that is just encumbered us. Oh, what a gift it is. Huge. Huge. You know, because we don't know what we don't know. But we know that things don't always go right.

And we know. There's difficulties. And we might run into certain things over and over again. And how come, how come that again? And I think some of us set ourselves up in that. Well, I don't know if this is like the life I want to have, but it's the life I have. Who am I to change it? Who am I to change it? Right. You know, and in the process of changing it, I don't want to dis the people that brought me here thinking that, you know, if I change, I'm going to be saying something negative about the way I was raised or my ancestors. And we don't.

A lot of us, it's so hard to go there. Yeah, absolutely. And but the in that process, I think it's so healthy to remember that those people who supported us, who brought us into the world, were dealing with what they had to deal. With, too. That's right. I mean, the. The. Thing is, and. I would. Say unfortunate, but it's. Just the reality is that. These things just unconsciously. Get passed. On down the line. That that's what. Happens and no one means. To do it. But how much hope we can have if we begin to really? Yeah, we can look. At something.

About it. Yeah, we can do something about it. You know. We we don't just have to take it. Yeah. And then that helps our future generations of course. And so. We get. To change things and we get help along the. Way. You know that we're truly. Not doing it alone. That's such a great thing to recognize that we get help along the way. So I think that's it for us. Okay. Fantastic. Just for today though for today. So we'll speak with you again soon. Yeah absolutely. Thank you. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you for having me. Please follow rate and share our podcast and pass this episode along to someone who might need it.

I think that's everyone. This is. And now, love, listen to your dreams and live from your heart. And.